I happen to have been thinking about someone I've been missing a lot lately. This girl:
My grandma Gloria has been ill and in bed for nearly five months now. She's not the same anymore -- she's confused often because of the medication she takes, she's lost an alarming amount of weight and she's too frail to even sit up in bed. Though I still visit her often, I can't begin to explain how much I miss her and how vibrant and energetic she used to be.
On my way home from an evening visit a couple of days ago, I drove by a Bob Evans right off the highway... It was the one we always used to go to together, and also with my grandpa when he was still with us. Whenever my family decided to make plans to meet somewhere for dinner, it was always Bob Evans. Now, I haven't been there in months, and I probably won't want to go into that particular one ever again, just because I know she won't be with me.
This morning, I saw a gold Lincoln Town Car pulling into a parking lot, exactly like her car, and just thought of how I'll never be at my parents' house again and see her flying up the driveway in it for a surprise visit. Instead, it's been sitting in her garage, clean as can be because it hasn't even had the chance to see the snow this year. I know it still smells like her inside; her picture of Jesus still stuck to the dashboard, a mountain of Kleenexes stuffed in the center console along with her numerous cassette tapes and CDs of Vince Gill's Christmas albums. I'd always drive her around in the big Lincoln even though I hated it because it is so enormous, but she would always tell me I'm such a good driver.
I even miss simple things like her being able to wake up and get out of bed in the morning. How she'd sit at her kitchen table drinking tea and paying her bills. She'd get dressed and either go to the bank to count her money or out to lunch with the girls, stopping to pick up some Ohio Lottery tickets before she went home.
After my grandpa passed away, I stayed overnight at her house once every weekend, and I knew that someday I would be grateful to have spent that extra time with her. Unfortunately that someday is now, but I feel so thankful to myself for turning down weekend plans every now and then just to keep her company. But I will remember climbing into bed (a few hours after her) and she would always say "good night, God bless you," and tell me how much she loved me. In the morning, it would always be a big bowl of Frosted Flakes or Rice Krispies with cut up bananas and a cup of Lipton tea.
And, now that I've thoroughly upset myself for the evening, I will stop trying to think of memories to make me feel even worse... But I just wanted to get it down in writing (again) how wonderful and special this lady is to me. So if you have someone like this in your life, keep them close to your heart and make sure you store those memories in a safe spot because one day, you'll want to look back on them and smile.
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